愛情、欺瞞與綠卡：1991年出生的中國女博士吉美的沉淪故事

1991年出生的中國女子吉美，擁有博士學歷，在學術履歷上可謂出色。她原本被視為新時代女性的典範──聰明、有野心、願意走向世界。然而，她的留學之路卻最終演變成一場跨國醜聞，也暴露愛情、身份與金錢交錯背後的灰色地帶。

吉美在完成國內學業後，選擇前往荷蘭深造。她對外宣稱自己是單身，目標明確：找到一位當地男友，最好能結婚生子，從而獲得長期居留權或綠卡。她在社交圈中活躍，迅速與一位荷蘭男子建立起戀愛關係，並很快懷上對方的孩子。然而，當感情發展至婚姻邊緣時，吉美向男方提出一項要求——支付高達8.8萬歐元的「彩禮」。

這筆要求不尋常的「中國式彩禮」，讓男友感到疑惑和不安。他試圖溝通未果，最終選擇報警。警方介入後，揭開吉美背後的另一個世界：她在中國並非單身，而是早已婚嫁於人，且從中國丈夫家中收取66萬元人民幣的高額彩禮。

原來，吉美當初以「出國深造」為由，說服丈夫與其暫時分開，並攜帶那66萬元資金出國。初時她並未與中國丈夫解除婚姻關係，也未告知真實情況。隨著她在荷蘭與異國男友展開戀情，這段跨國感情逐漸導致她與中國丈夫的關係破裂。然而她並未主動解決婚姻狀態，反而試圖用懷孕與彩禮作為「情感與身份雙重保險」，進一步套牢荷蘭男友，以期盡快取得合法居留身分。

警方調查中，她的雙重婚姻、詐騙式的金錢操作與身份欺瞞行為，已構成重大法律問題。由於涉及欺詐與移民政策違規，最終吉美遭到羈押審查，並在法院審理後被驅逐出境，失去她苦心經營的荷蘭生活，連未出生的孩子也無法作為留在當地的「橋樑」。

此案在網路上傳開後，引發兩地輿論的熱議。有人譴責她將愛情工具化，亦有人質疑中國「高額彩禮」傳統對女性選擇的壓力與影響。部分網友指出，吉美本身具備學術能力與發展潛力，卻走上一條短視的捷徑，將婚姻視為通關手段，最終搬起石頭砸自己的腳。

而更多人關注的是跨文化交往中的價值觀差異。在中國婚姻傳統中，彩禮仍被許多家庭視為婚姻誠意的一部分，但這一觀念在西方國家幾乎不存在。當彩禮被帶入跨國婚姻談判中，沒有充分溝通與理解，極易引發誤解與衝突，甚至觸及法律紅線。

吉美的故事，是由學術與愛情交織而成的悲劇。從中國寒門學子到荷蘭留學生，她原本擁有選擇的自由與空間，但當她試圖將感情與金錢混為一談，並在兩種婚姻制度間遊走取利時，便注定走上錯誤的不歸路。最終，她失去身份、名譽，甚至家庭，留下一地支離破碎的選擇與後悔。

Love, Deception, and a Green Card: The Downfall of Chinese PhD Holder Ji Mei, Born in 1991

Born in 1991, Ji Mei, a Chinese woman with a doctoral degree, once stood as a symbol of the modern, ambitious Chinese woman—intelligent, goal-oriented, and ready to embrace the world. However, her journey of studying abroad eventually spiraled into an international scandal, exposing the murky intersection of love, identity, and financial gain.

After completing her studies in China, Ji Mei decided to further her education in the Netherlands. Publicly presenting herself as single, she pursued a clear goal: to find a local boyfriend—ideally someone she could marry and have children with—in order to secure permanent residency or a green card. She was socially active and soon entered a romantic relationship with a Dutch man, eventually becoming pregnant with his child. As the relationship approached the brink of marriage, Ji Mei made an unexpected demand: a bride price of €88,000.

This unusual request for a "Chinese-style dowry" raised immediate red flags for her boyfriend. Feeling uneasy and unable to resolve the matter through communication, he eventually turned to the police. Their investigation uncovered a shocking truth: Ji Mei was not single at all—she had been legally married in China and had already accepted a dowry of 660,000 RMB from her Chinese husband.

In reality, Ji Mei had convinced her husband to let her go abroad under the pretense of further studies, taking the dowry money with her. She did not file for divorce, nor did she inform her husband of her activities overseas. As her relationship with the Dutch boyfriend deepened, her connection with her husband in China deteriorated. Yet rather than formally resolve her marital status, she attempted to use her pregnancy and dowry request as dual leverage—both emotional and legal—to secure residency in the Netherlands.

Authorities eventually determined that Ji Mei’s actions—including bigamy, financial deception, and immigration fraud—constituted serious legal violations. As a result, she was detained, put on trial, and ultimately deported. The life she had carefully constructed in the Netherlands fell apart, and even her unborn child could not serve as a “bridge” to remain in the country.

The case went viral online, sparking heated debate both in China and abroad. Some condemned her for weaponizing love and marriage, while others pointed to the burdens placed on women by the traditional Chinese dowry system. Many observers lamented that Ji Mei, despite her academic talent and potential, chose a shortcut—treating marriage as a transactional tool—and in doing so, ultimately destroyed her own future.

The case also highlighted deep cultural misunderstandings in cross-border relationships. In Chinese marriage traditions, dowries are often seen as a sign of sincerity and commitment, whereas in most Western countries, the concept is virtually nonexistent. Without clear communication, introducing dowry demands into an intercultural relationship can lead to confusion, conflict, or even legal consequences.

Ji Mei’s story is a tragic interweaving of academic ambition and emotional misjudgment. From a promising student of humble origins in China to a disgraced deportee in Europe, she once had the freedom to shape her own destiny. But by entangling romance with money and navigating between two marital systems for personal gain, she ultimately sealed her downfall. In the end, she lost her legal status, her reputation, and her family—leaving behind a path strewn with broken choices and deep regret.